Identity: The Importance of Friends


“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart…” – Jeremiah 1:5

The phone rang and on the other line I heard a familiar voice that brought me back to a place five years ago.

I love when God rekindles a friendship. On this particular Saturday, that is exactly what He decided to do. My friend and I began discussing life over the past 5 years. The hurts, the regrets, the joys, the mountains, the journey. Through it all, the presence of Christ being a common theme. As the conversation turned to a more serious subject, she said with a smile in her voice, “It is amazing to hear the confidence and security you have in your voice. It wasn’t like that the last time we talked to each other.”

I smiled, gave the credit to God and the work He had done, and was reminded of a time when my life wasn’t so confident or secure.

“Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish. In your love you kept me from the pit of destruction; you have put all my sins behind your back.” – Isaiah 38:17

Have you ever been in a pit so dark and so deep that you feel like there is no way to get out? That is exactly where I found myself five years ago. God brought this tall, full of love friend into my life, and I was forever changed. I don’t think at the time she knew the depths of darkness I was in. She just loved me, wholly and completely. We would spend countless hours talking about God and enjoying the lessons and blessings He was teaching us. I loved her confidence, her full of life heart, and the way I could see Jesus in her. I longed for that in my life. She would call out the lies I believed about myself and would speak truth in it’s place. And even as I revealed some of the darkness that was in my life, she loved me deeper. She saw what God saw when He looked at me. She called that identity out in me and gave me a light to find my way back to Jesus again.


“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” – Proverbs 17:17

Then it happened. I had a choice to make as I came to a crossroad in my life. I looked at the path that I knew the Lord was calling me to and it looked too difficult for my feet to take. I cried out to the Lord telling Him that I could not do what He was asking me to do. I felt weak, defeated, unworthy.

“God arms me with strength, and He makes my way perfect. He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights. He trains my hands for battle; He strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow. You have given me Your shield of victory. Your right hand supports me; Your help has made me great. You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping.” – Psalm 18:32-36

It’s funny how the very thing you say you can’t do becomes the very thing God empowers you to do through His Spirit. I believe He does this to show us the mighty things we are capable of in His strength.

As I slowly began to make my way out of the pit and decided to choose the path that was a steep climb, this friend came to where I was and climbed with me. She cried with me, prayed with me and for me, and never stopped believing in me. With her help, and the strength of God, I found my way back into His arms and learned how to walk with Him again. I began wanting to find out who Jesus was…to really know Him. Why would this man come down from Heaven and give up everything just to die for me? Doesn’t He know the mistakes I have made? Doesn’t He know how unworthy I am?

The answer is yes.

Jesus knows the depths of our hearts. Every struggle. Every sin.
He loves us anyway.

Jesus knows the mistakes we have made. The ones we are making. The ones we will make tomorrow.
He loves us anyway.

He sees what we can’t see. Like a good friend, calling us out of our shame and darkness into more. Into life.


The simple fact is, while we are still unworthy, He equips and enables us to be ambassadors for Him. While we are covered in sin and shame, He calls us into light to give us the title of chosen, beautiful and loved. When we know who we are in Christ, it doesn’t matter what the world throws at us or what others think about us, we are His. We know what He sings over us and the mission He has called us to. We know we have been set apart, chosen for His purposes and fully equipped in His Spirit. We know we are His.

Take some time today to reflect on the journey He has carried you through, and ask God to reveal what He thinks about you.

Your identity is not in what you do, what you say or how you feel. Your identity is in Christ. I will say that again…your identity is in Christ. Once your heart has the realization of who He says you are, your actions, heart and life will begin to transform into the person He has made you to be.

Wherever you might be on this journey, take it from a girl who knows: there is no pit too deep that His love can not reach in, pull you out, and set your life right again on the Solid Rock.

He has fashioned us so carefully in His hands and given us a mission to speak out and live to the glory of His name. Wherever you might be on this journey, take it from a girl who knows: there is no pit too deep that His love can not reach in, pull you out, and set your life right again on the Solid Rock.


3 thoughts on “Identity: The Importance of Friends

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